October 5, 2009

I'm again amazed at the love and peace of Christ in the midst of dissapointment and pain. Saturday evening I was sitting in the truck waiting for Dorian, I was tired and decided to rest my head on the dashboard. Unfortunately when I leaned over it caused the infection around the fill valve of my implant to rupture, and after the fluid poured out it left the fill valve protruding from my skin. Needless to say I called the doctor right away! He told me not to eat or drink anything and that he'd get me in to surgery first thing Sunday morning. So we scrambled to get the kids taken care of and things in order for yet another surgery. Sunday morning we headed into the ER and waited for my turn in the OR to have the implant and valve removed. Surgery went well, and my skin is already looking better (it had been bright red from the infection), but I'll have to be on IV antibiotics for about a month. My doctors are trying to get a home health care service in place so that I can do that at home, thankfully! Last Wednesday I was so discouraged and in constant tears over all I was going through; but today, after losing my third breast in a year, I'm completely at peace in the Lord. A peace that passes all understanding!!! I'm just so thankful for His love and goodness to me! And for all of you who have been praying constantly for me...you held me up in prayer when I didn't have the strength to pray anymore, Thank You!


These are the words to a favorite song of mine...when I was first diagnosed my sisters came with me to some tests that were being done and we blared this from the car and sang it at the top of our lungs over and over. My sister reminded me of it today and I wanted to share one of my fight songs because it's so fitting.

One More Round by Barlow Girl

Round One wasn't what I'd thought it'd be.

Round Two I'm struggling to breath

Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven times I wonder why I stepped inside this ring

I may be knocked down and so bruised,

But I'm here to tell you I may be knocked down but not for the count!

So take me one more round

I'll just keep fighting.

One more round, it's messin me up but I'm still here.

One more round I'll come out swinging.

One more round I'm telling you now I'm not going to lose it here.

It's so hard to get up off the floor again.

But I know that victory is when

I'm pushing through the pain that tries to feed me lies that I won't reach the end.

I may be bloodied and so bruised

But I'm here to tell you that I may be knocked down but not for the count.

So take me one more round I'll just keep fighting.

One more round it's messing me up but I'm still here.

One more round I'm telling you now I'm not going to lose it here.

I am not defeated

Though you cannot see it

I have never won a battle on my own

I find strength in weakness

I find hope believing

God is for who can bring me down

So take me one more round I'll just keep fighting!!!