"As for me and my household, we will serve the LORD."
Joshua 24: 15

February 27th, 2009

I have been remiss in keeping everyone updated on my treatment these last few months. But I have a good excuse. I've had so much energy and felt so well that I'm too busy being a mom and a wife to sit down and write every couple of days. But since the kids are napping and I really don't want to do another load of dishes today I'll steal some time to get everyone updated. I finished my 33 radiation treatments in mid-January and have spent the last 6 weeks or so in a peace I'd almost forgotten exsisted. I got to go 6 whole weeks without going in to a single Dr.'s appointment!!! This week of course I've had two and I'm starting to get things lined up for the year. On Wednesday the Radiation Oncologist found a cyst on my left breast that she assured me wasn't cancer. I of course have heard that assurance before. This morning I met with the Breast Surgeon and she did an ultrasound of the cyst and believes that it is benign, but is sending me in for a mamogram to make sure. I'm thankful that she's being precautious but I'm resting in the Lord fully. He hasn't brought me this far to abandon me now. While I was talking with my Doctor it struck me that except for the very first day I was diagnosed no one had ever talked 'stage' with me (what stage of cancer I was in). The first doctor (said I was stage 2a) was less than thorough and I knew that at the time, that's why I switched, but I'd never bothered to ask where all the tests that my new doctors ordered put my cancer stage. And maybe it's a good thing because stage 2 felt beatable to me at the time. And although facing cancer was scary in itself, if I'd know I had stage 3 cancer it would have been a lot harder for me. I always knew it was bad, but stage 3 just would have been harder for me to cope with. And now, I'm in awe! Oh how very good our God is. He's protected me and sheltered me when I've needed it, He's sustained me and strengthened me on the days I thought I couldn't go on, He's cried with me, laughed with me, provided for me, and loved me every day of this ordeal and beyond. He's showed me the beauty He sees in me...a beauty that goes beyond the hair that fell out and the breast that was removed. And He's shown me that there is nothing to fear in death...and what a great gift of joy every day on earth is.

2 comments:

Brenda said...

My precious Shell,
You inspire me with your faith walk and encourage me in mine. You've always been beautiful to me, but I'm your mother and naturally think so, yet you've become more beautiful over recent months from a deepening strength that resonates from within. My heart is grateful to our amazing Father who cares for you so completely day by day. To Him Be All The Glory!
I love you forever,
Mom
PS Thanks for the wonderful mother daughter date last night!

Unknown said...

Dearest Shell,
My heart breaks to hear that you must have, yet, another x-ray after all you have been through. Praying the mammogram shows "all clear". Luv ya, Liz XOXO